'Not everything is about the Shoah,' say volunteers working with survivors

28 March 2008

By Ruth Sinai

The 14 young men and women who are doing their national service in a program to help elderly Holocaust survivors do not have an easy time of it. One survivor, for instance, gave volunteer Shira Nevo a blow-by-blow account of how the Nazis threw her mother into a crematorium. "All I wanted to do was run home and hug my mother," related Nevo. "It's emotionally exhausting. When they talk, I see everything in front of my eyes."

Some of the survivors tell her things they never told their own families, so as not to burden them, Nevo added.

Hinanit Yoel, another volunteer, stressed that "not everything is the Holocaust"; the subject arises only if some ordinary activity happens to remind the survivor of a Holocaust experience. Nevertheless, she said, when she hears their stories, she often wants to cry.

The volunteers received five days of training before starting, and every week they meet with a social worker to discuss issues that have arisen or might arise - for instance, how to cope with Alzheimer's and dementia.

But if the program has difficult moments, it also has pleasures. Chen Peretz said she has acquired three new grandfathers and two new grandmothers. Rina Ben Avraham said that one survivor she works with is trying to matchmake for her and another is giving her career advice. "They have enormous experience, and the wisdom that goes with it," she said. "I tell them things I don't tell my parents."

The volunteers consist of 11 women and three men. Six of the 14 are secular; seven of them are grandchildren of survivors. Each has five or six survivors that he visits twice a week. Some are helping the survivors document their Holocaust experiences.

The project was set up to combat the feelings of loneliness that the elderly often experience. Initially, it was difficult for the young volunteers, "and there were doubts about whether they would stick with it or abandon the elderly people," related Brachi Dalitzky of the Pensioner Affairs Ministry, which sponsors the program. "But today, all the elderly say it's a ray of light."

Eventually, Dalitzky said, she would like to have 350 volunteers. That would enable the project to reach far more than the 80 senior citizens it reaches today, and to include those who are not survivors as well. However, she said, it is hard to find the volunteers: Most would rather work with children.