How Did the Two Camels and a Goat Ride in a Car?

A boy peers from behind camels and a goat riding in the trunk of a butcher's car in the city of Hebron, on 31 January 2009.

Very carefully, even they get tired of walking and enjoy a ride.

The George W Bush Presidential Library ...

... is in the planning stages!

The Library will include:

The Hurricane Katrina Room, which is still under construction.

The Alberto Gonzales Room, where you won't be able to remember anything.

The Texas Air National Guard Room, where you don't even have to show up.

The Walter Reed Hospital Room, where they don't let you in.

The Guantanamo Bay Room, where they don't let you out.

The Weapons of Mass Destruction Room, which no one has been able to find.

The National Debt Room, which is huge and has no ceiling.

The 'Tax Cut' Room with entry only to the wealthy.

The 'Economy Room' which is in the toilet.

The Iraq War Room. After you complete your first tour, they make you go back for a second, third, fourth, and sometimes fifth tour.

The Dick Cheney Room, in the famous undisclosed location, complete with shotgun gallery.

The Environmental Conservation Room, still empty.

The Supremes Gift Shop, where you can buy an election.

The Airport Men's Room, where you can meet some of your favorite Republican Senators.

The 'Decider Room' complete with dart board, magic 8-ball, Ouija board, dice, coins, and straws.

The museum will have an electron microscope to help you locate the President's accomplishments.

Note:
I happened upon this and wondered if this was actually people’s real views of the Bush Administration. While the intention it is assured meant to be humor, it is actually rather grim.

As to the two story outhouse, I was actually trying to find a possible model of the Bush library; when this appeared.

As to the real Library:

The George W. Bush Presidential Library is the future presidential library of George W. Bush, announced to be located on the campus of Southern Methodist University in Dallas, Texas. Construction of the library is planned to begin in 2009, and is expected to cost $200 million to $500 million.

The Seagulls are Calling

Media Propaganda is so bad, that even the Seagulls are complaining.

Despite His Temper Tantrum's and ...

Excessive need to insult, threaten people, create wars and then you just got, U.S. President George W. Bush; with nothing to do.

The Charlie the Tuna Chain-saw Massacre

Lisa Campbell and her mother, Mel Campbell, look over the pieces of Charlie the Tuna on June 6 behind a fire station in Charleston, Oregon.

13 June 2008

It turns out the fate of Charlie the Tuna of Charleston, Ore., was sorry indeed. The 8-foot Monterey cypress sculpture that used to greet visitors to the coastal fishing town was filleted by two young men who stole it as a prank and then, panicked they would be found out, took chain saws to it.

Not that Charlie would have lasted much longer anyway, the town learned, what with the way bugs and rot had hollowed out his innards.

The statue stood beside the South Slough Bridge into Charleston until Mark Santos and Marvin Terry Jr. swiped it last month.

"We had planned to wait a little while and then leave Charlie in a random place in town where he could be returned unharmed," they said in an apology letter published in The World of Coos Bay.

But someone tipped off sheriff's deputies, who started nosing around. Santos and Terry rushed to their hiding place and tried to move Charlie. But the statue wouldn't fit in their truck.

"We decided to chop him up so we could move him," they said. "This was not pre-planned."

Deputies caught them in the act and charged them with theft and criminal mischief.

Mel Campbell of the merchants association had painted Charlie many times over the years — he was in blue with an orange hat, after the StarKist ads' Charlie.

Santos has paid her a visit, and Campbell is asking for leniency.

"This was just a terrible, dumb, stupid prank that went absolutely wrong," she said.

A wake is planned Saturday at the town's visitors center. The Wild Women of Charleston and the Tuna Guys will offer musical moments. The remains are to be burned and buried at the center.

Mourners are invited to share stories about Charlie, and tuna recipes.

"Sorry Charlie."

Somewhere in the Irish Sea…

Is the USS Montana

The idea for this video is surely, meant for humor and not intended as an insult to the U.S. Navy.

Osama bin Laden Condemns Israel

Now that is a mouth full since the majority of his messages have so far been a fraud nor has Bin Laden been seen in years.

Makes me think of a joke and American told me a little time back, that Bin Laden was in Crawford, Texas sitting at the ranch pool with sunshades in a chaise lounge, sipping a cool drink.

Does make one wonder?

U.S. idea of a Palestine Roadmap?

10 March 2008

Dick Cheney, the US vice-president, is to visit Palestine next Sunday and as George W. Bush is pushing everyone to shore up a dead peace plan and lost roadmap.

What Bush should be saying, “I know it is lost in the floorboard of the car somewhere. Isn’t Palestine, by Omaha? By the way Dick, what is that word 'peace' mean again?”

Here We Go Again!

That’s all folks!

The Story of the Shoplifting Seagull

I hope they like potato chips?

Palestinian Ninja Chick

Where the Zionist meet the Matrix?

This clip is from a Movie.

The Monkey Soldier

I wonder what branch of the military he trained?

Be Afraid, Be Very Afraid. And if You’re Not, You’re Just Not Trying

21 July 2007

by Mark Drolette

Did you know you stand a better chance of either being eaten by a shark (in your bed) or hearing George W. Bush use proper subject-verb agreement than you do of being the victim of a terrorist attack?

From where does this information emanate? Well, I just made it up, but if that approach is good enough for the White House, it’s good enough for me.

Seriously, though, I know my chances of dying at the hands (or feet) of a suicide shoe bomber, or even one with an explosive sock, are infinitesimally small. And even if it happens, it happens; I’m not going to let unreasonable fears run my life. (As opposed to reasonable ones, like, say, getting married for a fourth time, but that’s another story. Or several, all available at the county courthouse.)

But way too many Americans don’t think like that. Millions are scared out of their wits of being blown to bits, judging by the way they swallow whole the feary tales they’re fed by the Brothers Grim (aka Bush and the Dick). They accept as true the most fantastic things, booga-boogas that even a nanosecond’s worth of introspection would show to be utterly laughable.

For instance, in December 2005, Bush came up with this beaut that, naturally, the whoreporate media didn’t bat a hooker’s fake eyelash at:

The terrorists’ stated objective is to drive U.S. and coalition forces out of Iraq and gain control of that country, and then use Iraq as a base from which to launch attacks against America, overthrow moderate governments in the Middle East, and establish a totalitarian Islamic empire that reaches from Spain to Indonesia.

Now honestly, you don’t believe that, do you? Because if you do, I’ve got a lovely lot of seventy-two virgins you may be interested in. (Only a few are “pre-owned,” too.)

But of course you don’t, because you have smarts (which, any day now, are sure to be banned by executive order). Plenty of folks do buy Bush’s bullying bull, however, no doubt the same scaredy-cats who are convinced rapidly-replicating Muslims will soon take over Europe and, worse, make everyone renounce pork.

Check out Johann Hari’s experience, as recounted in The New Republic, on a week-long National Review-sponsored cruise he somehow survived that was, surprise!, replete with rabid right-wingers.

While aboard, Londoner Hari is “asked nine times…when [he plans on] fleeing Europe’s encroaching Muslim population for the safety of the United States.”

When a woman learns he’s childless, she warns him he’d better get on the ball(ing) since: “The Muslims are breeding. Soon, they’ll have the whole of Europe.”

Another woman intones, “I went to Paris, and it was so lovely. But then you think — it’s surrounded by Muslims.” Her friend adds ominously: “They’re out there, and they’re coming.”

Finally, at cruise’s end, Hari gets some helpful parting advice from a paternalistic judge: “We have written off Britain to the Muslims. Come to America.”

I’d suggest Hari not tarry, for at the rate things (like the Constitution) are going, it won’t be long before we’ll have nothing left to fear in America but being told there’s nothing we shouldn’t fear.

See, as everyone knows, Bush is famous for exclaiming: “They hate us for our freedoms!” Well, he’s taken care of that — by taking care of them. Freedoms in today’s America are scarcer’n a San Francisco Giants World Series championship. (As a lifelong fan, that one hurts.)

If the terrorists still detest us for our long-gone liberties, I wish someone would update ‘em right quick so they can go pick on some other country that doesn’t consider “cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment” a perfectly acceptable way to gain legally admissible statements (courtesy of the Military Commissions Act of 2006).

Quaking Americans’ Allah-encompassing fear about being overrun by terrorists (read: Muslims) is also evident per their regular parroting of another favorite Bushism: We either fight them over there or fight them here.

OK, so who’s got a copy of the Terrorist’s Handbook? Is there some rule in there that precludes them from fighting us in both places at once? Even if there isn’t, or if there is and the terrorists decide at some point to break it (they’re notorious cheaters: play Scrabble with one and you’ll understand), just how, exactly, would they get here?

By rowboat? Dirigible? Mailing themselves in packages? (Someone immediately alert the post office to check all parcels bearing air holes or stickers of Osama bin What’s-His-Name.)

Look, no one with any real intelligence (i.e., non-Republicans) doubts there are, indeed, truly evil men intent on using any means necessary, including instilling paralyzing fear deep inside the psyche of every American, to help destroy this country. Thus, I feel it my patriotic duty to reveal exactly where these monsters are headquartered:

1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

Mark Drolette is a writer who lives in Sacramento, California, and whose next book, Why Costa Rica? Why the hell not?, will also be his first. It will be available once it's finished, published and then made available.

Labels: Life is Like a Box of Chocolates...

28 June 2007

by Housewife4Palestine

Seems these days people are great with labeling people and I am yet to understand why?

You have this political view, so you must be this…? Still trying to understand this one.


You believe in modest dress, so you must be an ‘extremist or a radical? What do you call the person in a mini skirt? All Knock-kneed or couldn't afford the other half of the skirt?



Your views are not mine so you must be Paranoid or Crazy? Always curious, of their state of mental health, as I have been checked and told I am very normal.



Your Palestinian, so you must be a terrorist? I have never terrorized anyone, not even my own family; they actually love me. *

And the label’s can go on…

The best Label, I can give myself, “I’M ME!”

...Never know what your going to get!

*(Palestinian women selling vegetables and herbs in front of Damascus Gate of the Old City of Jerusalem. )

What Makes a Modern Housewife?

by Housewife4Palestine

I do not sit in my easy chair sucking on bon bon’s, even though I like them.

My children and husband always comes first.

While my home is not always as clean as I like, at least the dirt is ours.

My husband is a better cook, so I not like to argue nor carry the heavy loads of laundry.

I have been known to share recipe’s, but I would rather look at birds instead.

I like to read, I like to write, so freelance writing is my hobby; which some complain and say a job.

I have been known to sew and share clothing tips, but I rather bargain shop these days.

I love hospitality, rather at my home or there’s, for it always seems the coffee and tea is better at there’s.

I will usually help anyone regardless of who they are, even the stray mouse who patter’s at my door.

So you say what makes being a housewife, enjoying the life you live.

Say Hello, Maz Jobrani

“Hello, I am Muhammad and I am just baking a cookie…”

Arabic Cardamom Shortbread (Gorayba)

with Maz Jobrani, the Iranian comedian.

Is Smoking Haraam (Forbidden) in Islam?

Islamic scholars have historically had mixed views about tobacco, and until recently, cigarette smoking has not been unanimously forbidden or even discouraged.

But, I will admit some people disagree or even frown upon it.

Furthermore, something I have noticed too, that smoking seems to go along to many times with people prone to drinking and drinking is forbidden.

Why I Never had a Desire to Own a Treadmill

Dog Fight

A man walks into a bar one day and asks, "Does anyone here own that rottweiler outside?"

"Yeah, I do!" a biker says, standing up. "What about it?"

"Well, I think my chihuahua just killed him..."

"What are you talkin' about?!" the biker says, disbelievingly. "How could your little runt kill my rottweiler?"

"Well, it seems he got stuck in your dog's throat!"

Hooray for Bush!

The following are examples of political cartoons that have been swirling around since Bush took office.


Bush's Tragedy 

One day, President Bush visited an elementary school. All the kids were so excited to get to meet the President. He began to talk to them and asked them to define the word ''tragedy.''

"Well," one girl replied, "If my mommy ran over my dog, Rover, that would be a tragedy!"

The President smiled at the little girl and said, "No, sweetie. That would be an accident! Can anyone give it a try?"

A little boy sitting across the room raised his hand and said, "I know! I know! If our bus driver ran off of a cliff and killed everyone!"

The President shook his head and said, "No son. That would be a great loss! Doesn't anyone know of a good example of a tragedy?"

A small girl raised her hand and said, "Well, Mr. President, if you and Laura were in Air Force One and it was hit by a missile and blown to smithereens, most people would think that that was a tragedy!"

"Very good," he said. "And what was your reason for that answer?"

"Well," she said, "It would not be an accident and it sure would not be a great loss!"


Stamp Out Bush

Bush has launched a new first class stamp featuring his portrait.
On the very day the stamps are released they sell like hot cakes and Bush is enjoying the revenue of course.

Before long, complaints start flooding in like wildfire saying the stamps won't stick. Bush is unimpressed and so sends out his most trusted to check out on the retailers and the customers to see what's what!

Bush's agent return to report his findings:
"Mr president, there is nothing wrong with stamp"
"So why the complaints?" asks Bush
"People are spitting on the wring side of the stamp Mr President" came reply.


America's most intelligent President

An aircraft is about to crash. There are five passengers on
board, but unfortunately only 4 parachutes. The first passenger says "I'm
Shaquille O'Neill, the best NBA basketball player. The Lakers need me, it
would be unfair to them if I died". So he takes the first parachute and
jumps.

The second passenger, Hillary Clinton, says "I am the wife of the former
President of the United States. I am also the most dedicated woman
in the world, a Senator in New York and America's potential future
President. She takes one of the parachutes and jumps.

The third passenger, George W. Bush, says " I am the President of the United States of America. I have a huge responsibility in world politics. And apart from that, I am the most intelligent President in the history of the country and I have a
responsibility to my people not to die". So he takes a parachute and
jumps.

The fourth passenger, the Pope, says to the fifth passenger, a ten
year old schoolboy "I am already old. I have already lived my life, as good
person and a priest I will give you the last parachute". The boy replies
"No problem, there is also a parachute for you. America's most
intelligent President has taken my schoolbag..."


Bush does it again

During a propaganda tour, president Bush visits a school to
explain his politics to kids. He invites the kids to ask him questions.

Bobby stands up and tells him "Mr. President, I got 3 questions:"

1. How come, that although the count of votes was not in your favor, you still won the election?

2. Why do you want to attack Iraq without an imminent reason?

3. Don't you also consider the bombing of Hiroshima the biggest
terrorist attack of all times?

Before the president can answer, the recess bell rings,
and the kids leave the room.

After they came back, Bush invited them again to ask questions.
Joey stands up and tells him "Mr. President, I got 5 questions:"

1. How come, that although the count of votes was not in your
favor, you still won the election?

2. Why do you want to attack Iraq without an imminent reason?

3. Don't you also consider the bombing of Hiroshima the biggest
terrorist attack of all times?

4. Why did the recess bell ring 20 minutes early?

5. Where's Bobby?